Skip to main content

More Stuff my Kids Say

Feb 22, 2023 07:31PM ● By Matthew Jones

In a previous post, I wrote about all the funny stuff my 5-year-old son Benny has said over the years. I was able to remember all that stuff because I wrote it down, and suggested you do the same. So how did it go, did you start writing down the funny stuff your kid says? I hope so!

I’ve kept writing down my son’s good quips, and have been keeping track of my daughter’s funny quotes too. It’s fun to be able to look back and see how they’ve grown. My record of my son’s sayings starts off with simple toddler words (like how a car is a “gogo”) and shows his growth year by year. He gets more and more perceptive of what’s going on around him, and is able to put together his thoughts more sensibly. 

It’s fun to see how his jokes have progressed. At first, he vaguely understood the structure of a joke, but not the relationship between the setup and punchline. One of his early jokes that I wrote down was the confusing word salad: “How do chickens talk like candy canes? Because of cars!” But now he’s sort of getting it and making his own puns: “What do you call it when a frog is ripping paper? Rip-it, rip-it!”

Silly Lily

The last time I wrote about stuff my kids say, I just focused on my eldest, Benny. But little 2-year-old, Lily, is well into being old enough to string together whole sentences, and naturally outputs some great stuff. Here are my favorites from the last year.

  • My wife was wearing watermelon earrings, and Lily referred to them as “strawberry pizza.” Instant classic.
  • I was getting changed into my swimsuit, and she wandered into the room. She immediately announced, “Daddy’s naked! Putcha pants on, daddy!”
  • We started trying to potty train her last year (and are still trying). One time I asked her to go try using the potty, and she shrugged and told me, “Dere’s no pee-pees in my butt!”
  • Spaghetti is “askebby.” Tights are “sock pants.”
  • One time we got back from a brief car ride. She stepped out of the car and announced, “I love the house,” and hugged the garage door.
  • And the most recent and my personal favorite: I was telling her about how we would be going to Miami. She listened and nodded, and said she wanted to go to “Your Ami.” (She heard it as “My Ami”). Later, she had this exchange with her brother:
      • Benny: “We’re going to Miami.”
      • Lily (to me): “Is it Benny’s Ami?”
      • Benny: “No, it’s ‘Miami’”
      • Lily (to Benny): “No! It’s daddy’s Ami!”
      • Benny: “It’s ‘Miami’!”
      • Lily (exasperated) “Fine! It’s your Ami!”

More from Benny

Even in the time since I last wrote about this, I’ve written down a lot more great quotes from my son. Here are some of my favorites from the latter half of his year being 5.

  • We were on a trip during Hurricane Ian, and all the TVs in the lobby of our hotel were set to the news. Benny commented, “All of these movies are just about rain.”
  • One time when I was trying to get him up, he announced, “I’m not getting out of this bed until God says so.”
  • Benny sang me a new song he had made up about spelling the word "stop." “S P O T, S P O T, S P O T, stop!” I pointed out that he was spelling “spot,” and he responded, “I’m still working on it.”
  • (To me) “I don’t like you in the morning because you’re smelly in the morning.” Ouch.
  • He asked me, “Will you die if you touch lava?” Of course, I responded yes. He thought for a second, and followed up with, “What if you wear sunscreen and short sleeves?” I love where his head’s at. If it works for a hot day, why not for lava?
All kids have their own personal sense of humor, and their own way to look at the world. Keeping track of what they say I think is a great way to keep ahold of the person they were at each phase of their life. I'm sure your kids say some great stuff too—I'd love to hear about it!
Get Our Newsletters
* indicates required
FredParent eletters
Read Our Digital Issue
From Our Partners